sent a bit more
Guess you didnt like that one  hmmm lets see if i can do better. I started a little give away of my own btw |
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''I said to the Gym instructor "Can you teach me to do the splits?'' He said, ''How flexible are you?'' I said, ''I can't make Tuesdays''
GdcEKnhdmSxd3ocMSC2Z22Ebdy7EgMbHSo
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Give me food, and I will live; give me water, and I will die. What am I?
PM me the answer and I'll send you 1 K TDC.
If you use google you are a cheater and Beelzebub will CONSUME YOUR SOUL !!!
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A sandwich walks into a bar. The barman says ''Sorry we don't serve food in here''
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thanks. Here's another one that cracked me up :
I tried water polo but my horse drowned.
GdcEKnhdmSxd3ocMSC2Z22Ebdy7EgMbHSo
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I went down the local supermarket, I said, ''I want to make a complaint, this vinegar's got lumps in it'', he said, "Those are pickled onions''.  GdcEKnhdmSxd3ocMSC2Z22Ebdy7EgMbHSo |
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My friend just tried posting the funniest joke in the history of the universe, but he died from uncontrollable laughter.
Please donate so I can buy him a nice funeral : GdcEKnhdmSxd3ocMSC2Z22Ebdy7EgMbHSo
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It's Game 7 of the Stanley Cup Final, and a man makes his way to his seat right at center ice. He sits down, noticing that the seat next to him is empty. He leans over and asks his neighbor if someone will be sitting there. "No" says the neighbor. "The seat is empty." "This is incredible," said the man. "Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the Stanley Cup and not use it?" The neighbor says, "Well, actually, the seat belongs to me. I was supposed to come with my wife, but she passed away. This is the first Stanley Cup we haven't been to together since we got married." "Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. That's terrible... But couldn't you find someone else, a friend or relative, or even a neighbor to take the seat?" The man shakes his head. "No,” he says. “They're all at the funeral."
Satoshi is working in his basement when he hears a booming voice from above: "Satoshi, sell your BTC." He ignores it. It goes on for days. "Satoshi, sell your BTC for $3 million." After weeks of this, he relents, sells his BTC. The voice says ‘Satoshi, go to BitVegas." He asks why. "Satoshi, take the $3 million to BitVegas." He obeys, goes to the minecraft casino. Voice says, "Satoshi, go to the blackjack table and put it down all on one hand." He hesitates but knows he must. He’s dealt an 18. The dealer has a six showing. "Satoshi, take a card." What? The dealer has -- "Take a card!" He tells the dealer to hit him. Satoshi gets an ace. Nineteen. He breathes easy. "Satoshi, take another card." What? "TAKE ANOTHER CARD!" He asks for another card. It’s another ace. He has twenty. "Satoshi, take another card," the voice commands. I have twenty! Satoshi shouts. "TAKE ANOTHER CARD!!" booms the voice. Hit me, Satoshi says. He gets another ace. Twenty one. The booming voice goes: "un-fucking-believable!"
lol awesome. You deserve extra because it's a Satoshi joke |
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Hehhe
I'm in great mood tonight because the other day I entered a competition and I won a years supply of Marmite......... one jar
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Awww only 1 k.
Hmm how about this one : A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!'' The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: ''The driver just insulted me!'' The man says: ''You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you.''
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Following the recent announcement that all available humor has been used, and is now being recycled, a very unexpected reactionhas occurred in Congress. Responding to a flood of calls and letters,, members of both houses of Congress have come together to attempt to resolve the problem. In a rare show of bipartisan cooperation, a majority of Senators and Representatives signed a letter to the President asking him to release some of the US strategic reserves of humor. It is a little known fact, but the United States keeps a large reserve of humor, in a manner similar to that in which oil reserves are stored. Located in abandoned salt caves buried deep in Louisiana, the humor is stored for times of national emergency and general unhappiness. Speaker of the House Newt Gingrich, in a statement made during a press conference to announce the letter stated: "The American people have spoken. The vas majority of the comments we have all received have been from people who are tired of hearing the same jokes over and over again. Granted, there are some that are true classics, and one never grows tired of hearing them, but too many are marginal the first time one hears them, and they do not get any better with time. I would urge Mr Clinton to act swiftly, and to release some of the humor that has been stored away for years. It is in the best interest of the country to do so." Providing counter point, alan Greenspan, Chairman of the Federal Reserve, responded: "Few know this, but one of my duties as Fed chairman is to be the honorary Commissioner of Comedy. It is my belief that there is sufficient humor in the economy, and that an infusion of additional humor could lead to comedy inflation. currently, we now enjoy the lowest rate of comedy inflation in 30 years, and the Humor Retention Index HRI) is at the lowest that it has ever been. Just look at Al Gore. His hRI is so low that after he hears a joke, he forgets it before it reaches his brain. Releasing humor reserves at this time is ill-advised." When asked for comment, Al Gore responded: "What's a joke? What's a brain?" all of the arguments were made moot when it was reported by the FBI that the humor reserves had all disappeared. During an unrelated investigation, the FBI had received information that there might be an attempt made to obtain American humor by the Chinese, and when a check was made of the vaults, they were empty. Addressing a Senate Investigating Committee, Attorney General Janet Reno stated: "Our investigation initially centered on the Chinese government, but we quickly exhonorated them. Our investigation found that the humor in the strategic reserves had been secretly removed by President Clinton, and sold to the Indonesians. For a donation of $25,000 and a pair of jogging shoes, Indonesian nationals were given a night in the Lincoln bedroom and all of the humor that they could remember. Evidently, this went on for some time. We finally got a break when one of our agents made the connection with large numbers of laughing Indonesians found in the vicinity of the White house, not wearing shoes, and carrying armloads of towels monogrammed with 'LB'." A white House spokesman read a statement from Mr Clinton. "I don't see anything illegal or improper about telling a few jokes to the gardner or cook. If he wants to give me the shoes off his feet, who am I to turn down a friendly gesture like that. And if that same cook or gardner wants to donate $25,000 to my campaign, he has every right to do so. As for the Lincoln bedroom, these people have to sleep somewhere, and the Lincoln bedroom is not for sale. However, renting it for the night is not out of the question." source: http://www.jokebuddha.com/Inflation#ixzz2XSiPEIxq1 million coins please too : GdcEKnhdmSxd3ocMSC2Z22Ebdy7EgMbHSo |
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Sorry guys but Im having serious problems with my interwebs today, so I can't keep playing. Until next time !
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Ok, I;m ready for some more poker ! Who will join me ? Im at the 5/10 PXC table.... there's no rake and Im a big fish so come get some !
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sent Strange... nothing showing up in my TDC client... |
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GdcEKnhdmSxd3ocMSC2Z22Ebdy7EgMbHSo
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GdcEKnhdmSxd3ocMSC2Z22Ebdy7EgMbHSo thanks !
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Thx Chunkatuff and Silentspider for the good games !
EDIT : I'm ready to play some more, who wants some ?
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I'm waiting at the cashgame table 5/10 NL, come join me for a nice game of texas holdem !
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One question : WHY this coin ? What does it add ?
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You guys all have PXC forum account, yes ? Zack is gonna start a little give away there soon, a little birdy told me  ( check out the link in my sig ) |
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