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Author Topic: Make me laugh for a bitcent  (Read 36205 times)
max in montreal
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August 20, 2011, 04:51:32 PM
 #241

How can you tell when an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

Footprints in the butter. Shocked
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There are several different types of Bitcoin clients. The most secure are full nodes like Bitcoin Core, which will follow the rules of the network no matter what miners do. Even if every miner decided to create 1000 bitcoins per block, full nodes would stick to the rules and reject those blocks.
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August 20, 2011, 05:36:03 PM
 #242

What is yellow and has a B on it? A smiley with sun glasses B) Cool

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August 20, 2011, 07:25:15 PM
 #243


Some jokes I remember from school, just in case you have not heard them. These are pretty gross.

What's black and white and red all over?
A news paper.

What else is black and white and red all over?
A Nun on a meat-hook.

What goes from red to green at the touch of a button?
A frog in a blender.

What's red, screams, and sits in a corner?
A baby chewing on razor blades.

What's green, quiet, and sits in a corner?
The same baby 2 months later.

How do you make a dead baby float?
Tall glass of cola and two scoops of dead baby.


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August 20, 2011, 07:42:16 PM
 #244

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MeGmlX3oZ8s&feature=channel_video_title

hi
Ryland R. Taylor-Almanza (OP)
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August 20, 2011, 07:54:18 PM
 #245

True story from a Novell System Support Representative

caller: "Hello, Is this technical support ?"
Tech: "Yes, It is. How may I help you ?"
caller: "The cup holder on my PC is broken and I am within my
warranty period. How do I go about getting that fixed ?"
Tech: "Did you say a cup-holder ? "
caller: "Yes! it is attached to the front of my computer tower"
Tech: "Did you receive this as part of a promotion or at a trade show?"
caller: "No, it came with my computer, I don't know anything about a
promotion, It just has 4X on it."

At this point the tech rep had to mute the caller because he was laughing too high. The caller had been using the drawer of CD-ROM drive as a cup holder and snapped it off the drive.
Bitcents sent.

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Ryland R. Taylor-Almanza (OP)
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August 20, 2011, 08:00:16 PM
 #246

Bitcents sent. By the way, I don't currently have the time to read all of these. Tomorrow, I'll be reading every post from page 12 on, so if you have something good, try and post it by tomorrow.

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August 20, 2011, 08:19:00 PM
 #247

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-A40k72VWO-E/TiaVBDYV_pI/AAAAAAAAAac/zb0INDIsj7Q/s1600/funny_and_weird_6pv04.jpeg
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August 20, 2011, 08:45:27 PM
 #248

First photos of the Bitcoin Conference start to hit the web...
And the assigned seating chart can finally be revealed...

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August 20, 2011, 08:56:22 PM
 #249

Just gona leave this here for ya...

Make sure to read the OP in the pic before you scroll down!

http://img825.imageshack.us/img825/9823/vyegi.jpg
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August 20, 2011, 09:16:27 PM
 #250

My sig:
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Give him a mask and he will tell you the truth.


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August 20, 2011, 10:18:04 PM
 #251

What is the difference between a garage with a corvette in it and a garage full of dead babies?







A) I dont have a corvette.

1FekH1LvStVB4dpDpXELPR68RRGLCjrZDL

Man is least himself when he talks in his own person. Give him a mask and he will tell you the truth.

- Oscar Wilde
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August 21, 2011, 06:29:14 AM
 #252

I don't know how many of you shop at Costco, but if you do, please pay attention. I became a victim of a this scam while shopping there.

This happened to me and it could happen to you, too.

Here's how the scam works:

Two seriously good-looking 18-year-old girls come over to your car as you are putting your packages in the trunk. They both start wiping your windshield with a rag and Windex, with their breasts practically falling out of their skimpy t-shirts. It is impossible not to look.

When you thank them and offer them a tip, they say 'No' and instead ask you for a ride to another Costco. You agree and they get in the back seat. On the way, they start having sex with each other. Then they take turns climbing over into the front seat and performing oral sex on you, and in the process one of them steals your wallet.

I had my wallet stolen last Tuesday, Wednesday, twice on Thursday, again on Friday, and also yesterday and if all goes well - tomorrow............

If you appreciate this warning, please shoot me some BTC at 13d8rZRsqDgdYNHeyLFaxiSUJmMJyVmZVW
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August 21, 2011, 07:28:38 AM
 #253

I don't have a joke but, have you heard of unicycle hockey?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iCjuszJmK2Q&feature=channel_video_title
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August 21, 2011, 07:43:56 AM
 #254

total lol Cheesy




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August 21, 2011, 01:31:13 PM
 #255



Why did the cow roll down the hill?












Because it had no legs.



---


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August 21, 2011, 04:00:28 PM
 #256

Why did the hipster burn his lip on a poptart
He ate it before it was cool


hi
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August 21, 2011, 07:24:05 PM
 #257

Ok, I know this is a long one, but believe me, it will be worth your time.  Just whatever you do,

DO NOT SKIP TO THE END OR IT WILL RUIN THE WHOLE JOKE

Anyways, here goes....

So, there's a man crawling through the desert.

[...]
[...]
[...]
[...]
[...]
[...]
[...]
[...]


wow, this is the story that gave birth to "tl;dr".



https://localbitcoins.com/?ch=80k | BTC: 1LJvmd1iLi199eY7EVKtNQRW3LqZi8ZmmB
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August 21, 2011, 08:17:30 PM
 #258

Ok, I know this is a long one, but believe me, it will be worth your time.  Just whatever you do,

DO NOT SKIP TO THE END OR IT WILL RUIN THE WHOLE JOKE

Anyways, here goes....

So, there's a man crawling through the desert.

[...]
[...]
[...]
[...]
[...]
[...]
[...]
[...]


wow, this is the story that gave birth to "tl;dr".




The joke is on anyone silly enough to spend 30 minutes reading the joke, like I did.

There is a video version of that joke at:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BuU612EcB64&feature=related

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August 21, 2011, 08:24:39 PM
 #259

It's ez to lol

A blonde, wanting to earn some Bitcoins, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do.

"Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?"
The blonde said, "How about 50 Bitcoins?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?"
The man replied, "She should. She was standing on the porch."

A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money.

"You're finished already?" he asked. "Yes," the blonde answered, "and I had
paint left over, so I gave it two coats."

Impressed, the man reached in his
pocket for the 50 BTC's. "And by the way," the blonde added, "that's not a Porch,
it's a Ferrari."

Address:  17ud8nDvkQcTVWYXeN72Jurn48WiqYHFcr
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August 21, 2011, 08:28:50 PM
 #260


My mate just said to me, "If you became invisible, what would you do first?"

I said, "I'd go to Paris, find a performing street mime and beat him to death,
the round of applause he'd get would be astounding."



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