Wall of fame / shame. Shit posts so bad that they are actually funny

[xtraelv]

This shitposter won't let punctuation get in the way of the sheer brilliance of this investment advice:

You have to do the right thing if you want to sell bitcoin and you won't get what you don't want and you want to buy or buy bitcoin you will definitely buy at a low price and you sell at a high price but if you have found the price is right for you and you don't hesitate or regret the same price as bitcoin because we don't know the price of bitcoin is up and down, the best is the right conclusion to sell your bitcoin by getting profit

You have to draw very precise conclusions if you want to sell your altcoin so you don't get the losses you don't want and in my opinion if you want to sell or buy altcoin then surely you will buy at a low price and you sell at a high price but if you think you have got a price that is suitable for you to sell and you do not hesitate or regret the prices that sometimes go up and down altcoin because we all do not know the price of altcoin ups and downs, the most important is the right conclusion to sell your altcoin by getting profit

I see there were two solid attempts at premature punctuation.   When reading it out loud - it is where you stop to take a breath.

EDIT:

Just found this one:

Bitcointalk already have an existing coin which is the bitcoin it self, if you have not taken the time to read the brain behind bitcointalk forum well according to the information the forum was created by Santoshi Nakamoto him self and about the same time or period with the creation of bitcoin. Asking bitcointalk to created another coin of it own has no relevance instead we as a community will keep developing on the existing foundation which is bitcoin.

So close to Christmas...

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[suchmoon]

Hello there. My first use bitcointalks.

[bananaunana]

Sleeping team is good. The token will fly high on the floor

[nutildah]

They say every day a star is born.

Hello there. My first use bitcointalks.

Lol, I am so tempted to ask him to make it his last.

Hey you beat me to it! I came here specifically to repost this comment.

[nutildah]

I've been "trolling" this coin called FREE Coin (which actually costs money believe it or not) because they managed to crack the top 40 on less than $2000 a day average volume. Its because it has a total supply of 10 TRILLION and its price fluctuates between 1 satoshi and 1 gwei.

People purchasing it for 1 gwei are hoping that they can profit by selling it to the people stupid enough to purchase it for 1 satoshi. However, nobody's selling shit because there's 600 BTC sell walls set up by the token creator. When I called out the "CEO" about why he insists on remaining anonymous and telling people this token was a scam, I got this gem of a rebuttal as thanks for my efforts:



Any suggestions for a good retort?

[xtraelv]

I've been "trolling" this coin called FREE Coin (which actually costs money believe it or not) because they managed to crack the top 40 on less than $2000 a day average volume. Its because it has a total supply of 10 TRILLION and its price fluctuates between 1 satoshi and 1 gwei.

People purchasing it for 1 gwei are hoping that they can profit by selling it to the people stupid enough to purchase it for 1 satoshi. However, nobody's selling shit because there's 600 BTC sell walls set up by the token creator. When I called out the "CEO" about why he insists on remaining anonymous and telling people this token was a scam, I got this gem of a rebuttal as thanks for my efforts:



Any suggestions for a good retort?

 

[manfredmann]

<snip>

I do understand that it is actually funny to read post that are out of this world replies and the worst grammar construction. I understand also that this people had low educational background so this could be the reason for their funny posts. Yet, I should not laugh at them as a phrase in the poem on DESIDERATA states that even the dull and ignorant, they too have their story. Just take Bill Gates as an example. He did failed on his class and his classmate got high scores. And look to what happen now, Bill Gates was already listed as one of the rich people while his classmates were his employee.

So, this people could be an asset when it comes to investing in BITCOIN. Who knows that they hold huge number of bitcoins and just wanted to be part of the forum for cryptocurrency discussions though his/her English is not good.

[suchmoon]

So, this people could be an asset when it comes to investing in BITCOIN. Who knows that they hold huge number of bitcoins and just wanted to be part of the forum for cryptocurrency discussions though his/her English is not good.

Bad English is not the subject of jokes here. Shitposting (often in bad English) is. The people quoted here ain't Bill Gates for sure.

[TheBeardedBaby]

^ Just a quick thought here, if you have enough bitcoins will you spam for shitcoins? (rhetorical question)

[nutildah]

 

Thanks! I LOL'd.

A couple hours later CMC made a correction and now the coin is back down to #640, at a 95% loss 

Suddenly I no longer feel compelled to continue troll operations there, and a great emptiness. 

[nutildah]

So, this people could be an asset when it comes to investing in BITCOIN. Who knows that they hold huge number of bitcoins and just wanted to be part of the forum for cryptocurrency discussions though his/her English is not good.

Bad English is not the subject of jokes here. Shitposting (often in bad English) is. The people quoted here ain't Bill Gates for sure.

Yeah in mine for example, the guy is telling me not to post there, twice, and then ends it with the sunglasses smiley. That's pretty funny no matter what your native language is. Maybe I just have an odd sense of humor.
 

[DdmrDdmr]

Perhaps the whole Merit thing has got out of hand ... better add a disclaimer on the forum about the possible side effects it can have on people:

The best way to earn merit is by not following the ways of trying to earn merit but rather work hard so that merit would be the one search for you. Obsession about merit can be lethal and can make you fall short of the forum rules

[xtraelv]

^ Just a quick thought here, if you have enough bitcoins will you spam for shitcoins? (rhetorical question)

What is "enough" bitcoins ? There are 21 million to collect and each one is unique.  
I wouldn't spam - even if I had none.
It is against my principles.
The cryptosphere is filled with too much advertising white noise.

<snip>

I do understand that it is actually funny to read post that are out of this world replies and the worst grammar construction. I understand also that this people had low educational background so this could be the reason for their funny posts. Yet, I should not laugh at them as a phrase in the poem on DESIDERATA states that even the dull and ignorant, they too have their story. Just take Bill Gates as an example. He did failed on his class and his classmate got high scores. And look to what happen now, Bill Gates was already listed as one of the rich people while his classmates were his employee.

So, this people could be an asset when it comes to investing in BITCOIN. Who knows that they hold huge number of bitcoins and just wanted to be part of the forum for cryptocurrency discussions though his/her English is not good.

Even the dull and ignorant have their story. But I don't have to listen to it and they don't have to post it on a public forum.  Everyone can have their opinion but if it is stupid then they will be ridiculed if they post it on a public forum. The aim of this thread is to have a lighthearted laugh at the comedy that happens on this forum.

I have no issues with people who contribute or attempt to contribute towards conversation with poor English. Misuse of word or mispronunciation can have dire consequences and funny results.  Like one of my clients with a strong accent who threatened "I will sue you" to a contractor that had defrauded him. The contractor understood "I'm going to shoot you". The consequent sequence of events was a comedy or errors and misunderstandings.

[nutildah]

Perhaps the whole Merit thing has got out of hand ... better add a disclaimer on the forum about the possible side effects it can have on people:

The best way to earn merit is by not following the ways of trying to earn merit but rather work hard so that merit would be the one search for you. Obsession about merit can be lethal and can make you fall short of the forum rules

I wonder when the first merit-related death is going to happen (maybe its already happened).

- In-person merit sale gone bad
- Merit-induced heart attack / coronary failure
- Merit-induced suicide
- Mass shooting over not getting enough merits

[suchmoon]

So... Bitcoin is real when it goes up, but it turns into a unicorn when it goes down?

Bitcoin could be real money if have higher price, but when bitcoin still on lower price we always get lost or our investment, never get profit with bitcoin at this situation where bitcoin and altcoin really at lower and drop price.

Yea, I know, I'm gonna be really embarrassed when maman567 cures cancer, travels to Mars, and becomes a trillionaire.

[TheBeardedBaby]

I don't want to turn this thread in the political direction but I find the ClintonCASH ANN a but funny.
C'mon everyone want to see Killary behind bars but to make a coin to fund it.. well

~

Since she first entered politics in the 1970s, Crooked Hillary has used corruption and scandals to unfairly get ahead– placing America in harm’s way. Although the government may have lost interest in investigating Crooked Hillary for her misdeeds, millions of Americans haven’t.

ClintonCASH is a community-based cryptocurrency built upon Bitcoin and DASH. This privacy-focused cryptocurrency features a "Prison Fund" into which 10% of all mined currency is placed. This fund will be used to finance independent investigations and efforts to bring Crooked Hillary to justice-- all proposed and voted on by the community.

Beyond this, our long-term mission is to build a scalable digital currency for the masses. While many anonymous cryptocurrencies exist, ClintonCASH is the first digital currency of the "Hillary for Prison" movement-- one of the largest political movements in US history. It's unique cause gives it a wider audience and a much stronger potential for adoption and growth than any other cryptocurrency.

~

ClintonCASH is a crypto-currency built upon the features of Bitcoin and Dash to serve as a medium of exchange free of government interference. Beyond this, ClintonCASH is a community-driven endeavor to use the power of the blockchain to spur a new investigation of Hillary Clinton’s crimes and put her in prison, where she belongs. ClintonCASH will bring an end to corrupt political elitism.

ClintonCASH improves upon other cryptocurrencies with these unique features:
•   A community-run fund into which 10% of all mined coins after the 3,000th block will be placed.
•   This fund will support investigations into Hillary Clinton and other causes proposed and voted on by the community. 

•   An incentive structure through which master node operators are compensated with 45% of block rewards for running the ClintonCash network
•   Use of the ASIC-resistant Lyra2RE Proof-of-Work (PoW) algorithm to keep mining open to everyone 

•   Private Sending for anonymous payments 

•   Nearly instantaneous transactions
•   2MB block size

ClintonCASH is the first digital cash to fight political cash. If the Justice Department won't investigate Hillary, the ClintonCASH community will.

ClintonCASH is a cryptocurrency with a real purpose that people can believe in.

~

[CoinClarity]

Who knew the way to an instant trove of merit was so simple? You learn something new every day.

[suchmoon]

This is either a malfunctioning bot or another one of those Bill Gates doppelgangers:

What is your best deal with cryptocurrency?

If you ask cryptocurrency that digital money bud I thing be rich LOL.
If you ask Bitcoin I think this very awesome coz Bitcoin not only cryptocurrency there any special technology on blockchain and network.

Merits, who else feels the same way I do when merited?

Yes I feel great too like Superman or like I won the Nobel prize or a medal of honor lol, it makes me feel very appreciated

Now you're thinking "that's not particularly shitty or funny", but there's the thing: glenntalbot has not received any merits.

[suchmoon]

Proof of widespread adoption of Bitcoin shitcoins - toddlers still in diapers are getting interested:

How many tokens are allocated for ICO? I can not count

[crwth]

Came across this post

My countryman Pacquaio will be prevailing winner.
He will beat this Boner into a blodd filled pulp for all of us to enjoy.
Make sure I bet my money early

I think we are at the point of our lives where Boners will be defeated and be ecstatic doing it.

Let's bet on Boner to win.