Monster-Ant
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Activity: 112
Merit: 10
The ants came marching one by one
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October 22, 2012, 07:40:59 AM |
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Dank, you have no clue what the hell you are even planning. You HAVE to be trolling or posting for attention.
But I'll play along, just to show what an ignorant fool you are.
First of all, you are talking 1,000 acres. A square mile if 440 square acres. You are asking for two square MILES to be donated.
You're hoping for 1 MILLION people. That's 500K people per mile. A mile is 28,000,000 square feet. That means you have 56 million square feet. That means 56 square feet per person. That's a 9x6 area. Now, this is before even the facilities.
Let's build this like a military logistics base.
First of all, we need an area for vehicles. That's always first and foremost. So, we'll need room for emergency services vehicles and a helipad in case of emergency. (Irony is that during Woodstock the US military provided helicopter medevacs as well as bringing in supplies) We'll lop 2 acres off for that. You'll probably ignore that part and figure you don't need to worry about it, since you'll just pedal your bike there and expect everyone else to do the same, and you won't need helicopters, since this is all "positive karma" which, of course, Woodstock lacked, right?
Now, we need living quarters for staff. Nobody willing to work on the staff of music entertainers are going to be willing to stay in military surplus tents, so we'll have to provide trailers, and nice ones. Probably 20/30 footers. We better snatch away 5 acres for that. Not to mention the cost of the trailers. But you'll probably half-ass this and ignore it.
Now parking. For 1 million people. We better consider at least 750,000 cars. Better use truck size. There will be buses, motorhomes, and all of that. So we better go with slicing off at least 30 acres for that. (I've seen a military decommissioning depot with over a million vehicles in it, it was twelve square miles, nothing but vehicles as far as the eyes could see) But I guess you figure everyone will hitchhike and walk so you'll probably ignore vehicle storage.
Security. If you think you won't need security, you're a goddamn fool. Even Woodstock had security. Depending on local laws, you might have to hire a private security firm. Better find one willing to volunteer the time. They'll need to be bonded. Unbonded 'volunteer' security guards opens you up to major lawsuits when one of them beats a guy half to death or rapes a woman. You'll probably figure you don't need security, after all, this is the dank music festival and you don't have to worry about it. So you'll ignore this.
Medical: You'll need medical tents. For 1 million people you'll need the equivelant of a military field hospital, without surgical areas. Your best bet is 1 qualified medic per 500 people. That means you'll need TWO THOUSAND medics. You might want to contact the Army there, champ. Even if you decide to half-ass this, life everything else in your life, you'll need QUALIFIED people to administer first aid, anything else you'll end up with lawsuits when your drunken volunteers fair to treat frostbite and people start losing toes. You can expect, with 1 MILLION fucking people, that there will be an average of 20% of them suffer cold weather injuries, not to mention dehydration, injuries from fighting or the press of a million person crowd (I've been to massive concerts, like Monsters of Rock in the 80's, and just being in the front of the crowd left bruises on my ribs), rapes, assaults, drug overdoses, women going into labor, and just plain stupidity.
Now lets get to things that even YOU can't ignore.
Electrical: Without electricity you won't be doing anything but wishing. Unless you plan on running extension cords from some unwitting farmer's barn, you'll need generators. If you were stupid enough to think the extension cord and free electricity route, you'll find out that you'll lose ALL the electricity in that distance, not to mention possibly catching the cables on fire and burning down everything. So, you'll need generators, and not the little ones your grandpa has in the garage for when the power goes out. You'll need FEMA/military/Construction rated ones. We're talking the big 60KW generators. The generators you'll need cost about $1,200 a DAY to rent, unless you think the Army will be nice enough to loan a dipshit like you a VERY expensive generator.
Light sets: We aren't talking a few spotlights like in your high school theater. You're going to need a concert lighting set. Have you ever been to a concert, Dank? We're talking literally dozens, if not hundreds, of lights, the steel scaffolding to support them, the cabling and controls to run electricity to them. Those light sets cost tens of thousands of dollars, Dank. Nobody is going to lend you $150,000 in lights, not now.
Sound Equipment: This is NOT your high school's PA system, this isn't the sound system you had in theater class in community college. This is a multi-thousand dollar system. Do you realize just how much those systems cost to rent, move, set up? Have you ever SEEN one of those systems? You need a TEAM of audio engineers.
Sewage Handling: This isn't a couple porta-potties, Dank, this is literally a few thousand for your "Million Man Concert", and they have to be emptied at least every day, every other day at the least. But you probably figure everyone can just shit on the ground, get dystentary, and die.
Dank, this is without getting into the problems of the fact you intend on holding this concert, outdoors, IN THE WINTER, in the North America. I know you probably think "Oh, the desert! I'll do it there!" but are you even aware that in the desert temperatures easily drop below freezing at night? I can tell you from experience that desert nights are COLD. You hold your concert outdoors, in the winter, if it's a multi-day event, PEOPLE WILL DIE if you don't have tents for everyone, medical care, medevac facilities. People will get drunk and pass out, and people will die of exposure.
Don't try to wave this shit away with "Where there's a will there's a way" bullshit. We're talking the real world, not Dank's Imaginary World of Hookahs & Free Money.
While I could set up a military encampment in an hour or so, I'm drawing on centuries of doctrine, procedure, and knowledge to do so. There's manuals for how to do it. I'm TRAINED in how to do it.
You aren't trained to lead ants to a picnic with a jar of honey.
Dank, setting a concert up takes WEEKS of planning. The people who host Burning Man have been doing this for like 20 years, they have massive amounts of experience, and even they take months to plan everything out, make sure they've covered their bases.
I'm serious, you could really benefit from a hitch in the Army or Marines, a tour or two of Afghanistan.
And don't give me that crybaby shit about killing people. 3/4 of the jobs in the military have nothing to do with combat. Go into transportation or supply or another logistics branch, and you'd get an idea of the massive amount of effort and planning it takes to even arrange a convoy.
Take a job with a shipping company. Hell, get a job working for Wal-Mart in the warehouse and you'll get a feel for what it takes.
Right now, Dank, you're an idea man. That's ALL you have, is ideas. You don't have the education, the knowledge, or the experience, or hell, even the goddamn intelligence to understand the depths of your ignorance or what you need to learn to about.
Dank, quit wishing and coming up with ideas and do something. Complete ONE fucking project. In the time you've spent rubbing your face and/or ass against the string of your guitar someone who had taken lessons, even someone with no musical talent and a tin ear, could play simple songs that are beyond you.
Get a job, or just accept your family's help to go to college.
There are people who join the military, go out to fight and die, for the military's promise of college money, because otherwise they will never get the chance to attend college, and you spurn an offer than a significant and measurable amount of the US citizenry cannot afford to do without sinking themselves massively into debt.
Don't waste that opportunity, Dank. Go to college, get an education.
Make your dreams happen.
Right now you aren't even educated enough to understand in what ways you are ignorant, and why you are a laughingstock on these forums.
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