Tell us a joke....

[(oYo)]

[Vod]

Q:  How many cops does it take to push a black man down the stairs?

A:  He fell.

[elektibi75]

A few times to read it, although it did take,
making me chuckle, this joke ended up! 

I laughed quite a bit even though I'm sure I didn't get what I was supposed to.

Best MEME ever

[st4nl3y]

Q: How many pessimists does it take to change a light bulb?

A: None. Why bother? It's just going to burn out anyway.

[Gleb Gamow]

Q:  How many cops does it take to push a black man down the stairs?

A:  He fell.

Reporter: How did Emmit Brown found at the bottom of the lake with 300 pounds of stones chained to his body die?
Coroner: Strangest case of suicide we've even seen in these parts.

[Omikifuse]

See, there were these two guys in a lunatic asylum... and one night, one night they decide they don't like living in an asylum any more. They decide they're going to escape! So, like, they get up onto the roof, and there, just across this narrow gap, they see the rooftops of the town, stretching away in the moon light... stretching away to freedom. Now, the first guy, he jumps right across with no problem. But his friend, his friend didn't dare make the leap. Y'see... Y'see, he's afraid of falling. So then, the first guy has an idea... He says "Hey! I have my flashlight with me! I'll shine it across the gap between the buildings. You can walk along the beam and join me!" B-but the second guy just shakes his head. He suh-says... He says "Wh-what do you think I am? Crazy? You'd turn it off when I was half way across!

[Gleb Gamow]

Once, there were seven guys in an asylum, but now there are only five due to one escaping and another found lying on the ground outside the grounds dead due to a fall from who-knows-where. The official account is penned directly beneath the missing flashlight write-up.

[Decio]

[lady Royal]

I know 10 facts about you:
Fact 1: You are reading this.
Fact 2: You can't say the letter 'm' without touching your lips.
Fact 3: You just tried it.
Fact 4: You're smiling.
Fact 6: You're smiling or laughing again.
Fact 7: You didn't notice I missed fact 5.
Fact 8: You just checked it.
Fact 9: You're smiling again.
Fact 10: You like this and you're going to comment ..

[Gleb Gamow]

I know 10 facts about you:
Fact 1: You are reading this.
Fact 2: You can't say the letter 'm' without touching your lips.
Fact 3: You just tried it.
Fact 4: You're smiling.
Fact 6: You're smiling or laughing again.
Fact 7: You didn't notice I missed fact 5.
Fact 8: You just checked it.
Fact 9: You're smiling again.
Fact 10: You like this and you're going to comment ..

Dude, you got nothin' on me! I can tell you exactly what you're thinkin' at this very second. Ready? You were thinkin' at that very second that there is no way in hell I could know what you were thinin'.

[Xian01]

A man walks into a bar.

His alcoholism is destroying his family.

[Gleb Gamow]

A man walks into a bar.

His alcoholism is destroying his family.

Two men walk into a bar. The second man asked the first man, "Why didn't you tell me to watch where I'm walkin'?"

[lady Royal]

I know 10 facts about you:
Fact 1: You are reading this.
Fact 2: You can't say the letter 'm' without touching your lips.
Fact 3: You just tried it.
Fact 4: You're smiling.
Fact 6: You're smiling or laughing again.
Fact 7: You didn't notice I missed fact 5.
Fact 8: You just checked it.
Fact 9: You're smiling again.
Fact 10: You like this and you're going to comment ..

Dude, you got nothin' on me! I can tell you exactly what you're thinkin' at this very second. Ready? You were thinkin' at that very second that there is no way in hell I could know what you were thinin'.

Lolx .. it was just an joke.. one who read it will full concentration will do the things that are in fact common human behavior..
just chill ..

[st4nl3y]

A Scotsman, an Englishman and an Irishman are sitting in a bar in New York reminiscing about home.

"Back in me pub in Glasgow," brags the Scotsman, "fer every four pints of stout I order, they give me one fer free!"

"In me pub in London," says the Englishman,"I pay fer two pint's o' Guiness and they give me a third one free!"

"That's nuthin'" says the Irishman, "Im my pub back in Dublin, you walk up to the bar, they give the first pint fer free, the second pint fer free, the third pint fer free -- and then they take you upstairs and you have sex for FREE!"

"Is that true?" asks the Scotsman. "Has that really happened to you?"

"Well, no," says the Irishman, "but it happens to me sister all the time!"

[xmaxbit]

A nude girl walks in a bar .

Girl : Give me a bottle of wine .

Waiter[GAZES AT HER]

Girl : Have you never seen a nude girl ?

Waiter : Its not that . I am just wondering from where will you find your money out !

[Superhitech]

What did the penguin say to the other penguin?

Ice to meet you!

Huehuehuehue

[Gleb Gamow]

A Scotsman, an Englishman and an Irishman are sitting in a bar in New York reminiscing about home.

"Back in me pub in Glasgow," brags the Scotsman, "fer every four pints of stout I order, they give me one fer free!"

"In me pub in London," says the Englishman,"I pay fer two pint's o' Guiness and they give me a third one free!"

"That's nuthin'" says the Irishman, "Im my pub back in Dublin, you walk up to the bar, they give the first pint fer free, the second pint fer free, the third pint fer free -- and then they take you upstairs and you have sex for FREE!"

"Is that true?" asks the Scotsman. "Has that really happened to you?"

"Well, no," says the Irishman, "but it happens to me sister all the time!"

A redhead walks into a bar...

Bartender: Are you Irish and have a brother?
Redhead: Depends on the price of the drinks.
Patron: Does this place have an upstairs?

[QuestionAuthority]

A girl comes up to her dad and asks,

"Daddy, the prom's tonight, and I promised my date I'd pick him up. Is it okay if I borrow the car?"

Her father thinks, and says, "Okay, but only if you suck my dick."

Naturally, she is shocked, but her father's mind is made up. She really wants the car. So, resigned to her fate, she get down on her knees and starts doing the deed.

Soon after, she looks up in disgust, and says, "Daddy, your dick tastes like shit!"

"Oh yeah, that reminds me," her father replies, "you can't have the car tonight; your brother's borrowing it."

[st4nl3y]

A blonde calls her mom... Blonde: "Mom mom!! I'm a genius!" Mother: "Really dear? How's that possible?" Blonde: "I finished a puzzle that I've been working on for 1 year and on the box it said 'for 2-5 yrs'."

[talkbitcoin]

LOL
i like this thread.