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Author Topic: Does it looks responsible as woman telling husband you gamble?  (Read 1889 times)
suzanne5223
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January 11, 2024, 02:33:48 PM
 #121

Quite sometimes now i have been active in the gambling section and have pick interest to start gambling i have gone through lots of material in both the forum, i have seen that I can control my emotion as well as controlling my finance this includes;

  • Not involving myself in a revenge gambling
  • Not chasing profit after lost
  • Not involving oneself into compulsive gambling
  • Not solely replying on every game to be 100 percent correct
  • Not hoping that gamble is guaranteed
  • Not gambling with all my income or salaries
  • Among all, gambling for fun and not to enrich oneself

The point is my husband doesn't know that i have been secretly gambling and involving myself with gambling discussions and the rest, So, this morning when i woke something in me keeps telling me i should let him know to understand my involvement  to practice gambling.

Does this worth telling him or not please i need you collective ideas.
Glad you already know what to do and avoid in gambling but I hope you understand that these things are easy to say and difficult to follow when gambling. It's just like a newbie who's started trading with a demo account balance and her trading is profitable but when she tries real trading she understands everything is totally different.
Having said that, i believe you know your husband more than every one of us here and you ought to his level of understanding and maturity, the things he likes and dislikes. All these things will give you a hint if you can tell him about your involvement in gambling.
Getting responsible in gambling venture is hard because not all would really be successful when it comes to this and this is why it is really that good that shes really that having the control and having awareness on the actions that she's making.It is really just that shes in torn in neither telling or not on what she's been into into his husband on which just like on what most people been saying on here
that it is really just that right that she would be telling the things that shes really that into. It would be always best on having a relation which it doesnt really have that kind of secrets
and having those kind of hiding on something on which it is really just that less stressful that you are really that hiding something from your loved ones.
Its not something a healthy i should say for long time.
I understand what you are trying to say and yes there shouldn't be anything secret between her and their husband which is the reason why I said she knows her husband more than us and his level of understanding will determine her decision.
Having said that, let's be honest with ourselves. Is there a relationship that didn't have something one side hid from his/her partner? I'm not talking about something that involves cheat or disrespect.
Some things are hidden from partners due to the respect, and love we have for the person.

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January 11, 2024, 05:39:35 PM
 #122

I believe that if she can convince her husband that she is playing the  gambling for a temporary pleasure, her husband will not forbid her to play it. Gambling by informing the husband will also reduce the human pressure there. But here again if there is something opposite then there may be some problem. But above all the wife must inform her husband so that the bond of fidelity between them can be strengthened. Moreover, if her husband is also willing to bet there, then they both can do better research and take a more suitable decision to win the bet.
I think your opinion is right because it would be better for her if she shares about gambling with her husband. Because if her husband somehow finds out that his wife is gambling then he might get upset after knowing it. And when her husband  I think her husband can support his wife a lot if she tells him about gambling, but again it may be that her husband can't make her to gamble. But she should not talk to her husband about it, if there is a big difference between them later on.  There may be trouble.

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Mahanton
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January 11, 2024, 05:53:20 PM
 #123

Quite sometimes now i have been active in the gambling section and have pick interest to start gambling i have gone through lots of material in both the forum, i have seen that I can control my emotion as well as controlling my finance this includes;

  • Not involving myself in a revenge gambling
  • Not chasing profit after lost
  • Not involving oneself into compulsive gambling
  • Not solely replying on every game to be 100 percent correct
  • Not hoping that gamble is guaranteed
  • Not gambling with all my income or salaries
  • Among all, gambling for fun and not to enrich oneself

The point is my husband doesn't know that i have been secretly gambling and involving myself with gambling discussions and the rest, So, this morning when i woke something in me keeps telling me i should let him know to understand my involvement  to practice gambling.

Does this worth telling him or not please i need you collective ideas.
Glad you already know what to do and avoid in gambling but I hope you understand that these things are easy to say and difficult to follow when gambling. It's just like a newbie who's started trading with a demo account balance and her trading is profitable but when she tries real trading she understands everything is totally different.
Having said that, i believe you know your husband more than every one of us here and you ought to his level of understanding and maturity, the things he likes and dislikes. All these things will give you a hint if you can tell him about your involvement in gambling.
Getting responsible in gambling venture is hard because not all would really be successful when it comes to this and this is why it is really that good that shes really that having the control and having awareness on the actions that she's making.It is really just that shes in torn in neither telling or not on what she's been into into his husband on which just like on what most people been saying on here
that it is really just that right that she would be telling the things that shes really that into. It would be always best on having a relation which it doesnt really have that kind of secrets
and having those kind of hiding on something on which it is really just that less stressful that you are really that hiding something from your loved ones.
Its not something a healthy i should say for long time.
I understand what you are trying to say and yes there shouldn't be anything secret between her and their husband which is the reason why I said she knows her husband more than us and his level of understanding will determine her decision.
Having said that, let's be honest with ourselves. Is there a relationship that didn't have something one side hid from his/her partner? I'm not talking about something that involves cheat or disrespect.
Some things are hidden from partners due to the respect, and love we have for the person.
I agree about on having that secrets which arent supposed to be shared and not really just that means that you dont respect your partner but rather it is really just that showing that you are really that mindful about on the possible effects that it could give once it would really be known. This is why there are really indeed things in life on which it is really that better that you should really be keeping it as a secret forever on which it would really be just that a normal approach. I agree into those points somehow that when it comes to things like this one on where something it is really that totally against with your husband likings then it would really be just that right and something that worth for it to be told into him because it would really be that creating a potential conflict if things been known.

Just like on what everybody is saying that we do know on what are the risks of gambling that could give, even if we do say that you are really having that good control but when
things becomes a hobby then it would really be that turning out to be something that will really be a default activity and knowing gambling where you would really be gonna need to spend
and this is something that you would really be needing to look up.

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January 11, 2024, 06:24:25 PM
Last edit: January 11, 2024, 08:42:33 PM by sokani
 #124

Does this worth telling him or not please i need you collective ideas.

I think it won't be a bad idea if you open up to your spouse that you've started gambling. Marriage is all about no secrecy and truthfulness. If you keep hiding it from him and he finds out, I bet you he's not going to be happy with you. Though, you claimed you've been following gambling discussions for some time and you've been digesting some gambling tips, which is good but telling him would be wise because he's going to keep an eye on you to make sure you're on track.
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January 11, 2024, 07:16:48 PM
 #125

I think your opinion is right because it would be better for her if she shares about gambling with her husband. Because if her husband somehow finds out that his wife is gambling then he might get upset after knowing it. And when her husband  I think her husband can support his wife a lot if she tells him about gambling, but again it may be that her husband can't make her to gamble. But she should not talk to her husband about it, if there is a big difference between them later on.  There may be trouble.

If the husband had enough assets,the woman can easily say his husband to gamble to enjoy.Because enjoyment is different one from the earning,the gambler who had enough money will play gambling only for the entertainment.They never bother about the money returns from the game.The poor gamblers can’t play the gambling as entertainment because they using the gambling only for money earning purpose.If the woman also engaged in the gambling,surely she would not asked her husband to do gambling.Because the gambling was need for money for the rotation as like the business.So the gambling by husband and wife leads to financial problems.

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January 11, 2024, 07:22:09 PM
 #126

I think your opinion is right because it would be better for her if she shares about gambling with her husband. Because if her husband somehow finds out that his wife is gambling then he might get upset after knowing it. And when her husband  I think her husband can support his wife a lot if she tells him about gambling, but again it may be that her husband can't make her to gamble. But she should not talk to her husband about it, if there is a big difference between them later on.  There may be trouble.

If the husband had enough assets,the woman can easily say his husband to gamble to enjoy.Because enjoyment is different one from the earning,the gambler who had enough money will play gambling only for the entertainment.They never bother about the money returns from the game.The poor gamblers can’t play the gambling as entertainment because they using the gambling only for money earning purpose.If the woman also engaged in the gambling,surely she would not asked her husband to do gambling.Because the gambling was need for money for the rotation as like the business.So the gambling by husband and wife leads to financial problems.
There would really be no problems as long the finances arent really that affected or something that their income could sustain or simply  they arent compromising into those funds which are really that intended for other important means. Husband would really just that easily understand and would really be letting you to play as long there are no potential problems raised on playing gambling such as on this condition on which it is really just that understandable but if the situation is really that totally different or opposite on which your family does have that financial struggle or something that we can called to be standard
then it would be normal that your husband would really be disappointed at you because you've been spending money on something which it isnt really that important.

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January 11, 2024, 07:30:26 PM
 #127

Quite sometimes now i have been active in the gambling section and have pick interest to start gambling i have gone through lots of material in both the forum, i have seen that I can control my emotion as well as controlling my finance this includes;

  • Not involving myself in a revenge gambling
  • Not chasing profit after lost
  • Not involving oneself into compulsive gambling
  • Not solely replying on every game to be 100 percent correct
  • Not hoping that gamble is guaranteed
  • Not gambling with all my income or salaries
  • Among all, gambling for fun and not to enrich oneself

The point is my husband doesn't know that i have been secretly gambling and involving myself with gambling discussions and the rest, So, this morning when i woke something in me keeps telling me i should let him know to understand my involvement  to practice gambling.

Does this worth telling him or not please i need you collective ideas.
It depends, while some think that you must tell everything to your partner no matter how small, I personally think that even in a committed relationship some sort of autonomy must be preserved as well, so as long as you are only gambling a few dollars here and there and that is money that is not really affecting the quality of your life then it is OK not to tell him, however if you are gambling more than that, even if you have everything under control, you must tell your partner what is going on so they can budget accordingly.

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January 11, 2024, 08:22:56 PM
 #128




The society hasn't really embraced women who gamble, they believe women who gamble are irresponsible and not fit to be called wife materials. We shouldn't be surprised If your husband goes against your decision to gamble.  If this becomes the case, whatever your reasons are for wanting to gamble, you have to keep it aside and obey your husband. Everything here depends on your husbands understanding of what gambling is all about.
The society perspective on gambling is gradually changing and alot is beginning to be looked at differently and this is what the majority of people do not understand, sometimes we need to look away from those gender inequality and look at the various advantages that gambling presents to individuals and also the negativity too, because the result of it is what the society is interested I and if you allow the gambling anxiety to take over you and become addicted that is when society will talk about you.
But these days of online gambling where anyone can gahusband'sm the comfort of their home and also make all necessary mistakes and actions without third-party knowledge,  so is hard to even discover which woman is gambling and who is not, and most times we don't even know about it.

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January 12, 2024, 02:30:58 AM
 #129

I think your husband has the right to know what you are doing, although perhaps his first response will be to forbid you from gambling, you can explain slowly that the gambling you do is not random and you only do it occasionally with as little money as possible, explain that you gamble moderately and can be responsible, you can convince your husband with a wiser attitude, I'm sure your husband will understand and maybe will let you gamble and of course with your husband's supervision because the wife responsibility is on her husband and if you make a mistake on this site your husband can help you and if you secretly gamble without telling you and one day your husband finds out by himself, I don't think that will be good for your domestic life because there is a big possibility that your husband will be very angry.


I don't know the husband that will be happy with the wife to disclose that she is gambling without profit. Gambling is about profiting and many gamblers have been criticized for gambling without profit and encouraging them to stop. So if the wife is gambling and she is not making profit, what is she going to be telling the husband? Just to disclose to him she has been using family to gamble without profit?

Except she is coming to make a confessional statement to the husband that she has been gambling without profit and she wants to stop.

If she disclose to her husband that she is gambling and the husband see she is not making profit and if she is asking to continue then he will demand to know how long she has been gambling and that will determine if he will support her or not. What about if the husband does not gamble, then this will become another kettle of fish because she has to show she has been profiting for she to continue.
I think this is just about the honesty of a wife who wants to reveal about her gambling to her husband, not about her making a profit from gambling and then telling her husband about her profits from gambling, I know maybe the husband will not be happy if he sees his wife gambling but not getting any profit at all because it's the same as wasting money, but a wife also needs entertainment. There's nothing wrong with gambling and the aim is not to make a profit but simply to relieve fatigue with her daily household work.

I think everyone knows that gambling is not always profitable as long as he can stick to his responsibilities and not overdo it then his gambling will be fine and a husband should be able to understand that his wife needs entertainment, not just taking care of the household because with this entertainment a wife cannot will feel inner pressure due to fatigue and most importantly there are no secrets between husband and wife if they want to do something they want.

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January 12, 2024, 02:44:50 AM
 #130

Quite sometimes now i have been active in the gambling section and have pick interest to start gambling i have gone through lots of material in both the forum, i have seen that I can control my emotion as well as controlling my finance this includes;

  • Not involving myself in a revenge gambling
  • Not chasing profit after lost
  • Not involving oneself into compulsive gambling
  • Not solely replying on every game to be 100 percent correct
  • Not hoping that gamble is guaranteed
  • Not gambling with all my income or salaries
  • Among all, gambling for fun and not to enrich oneself

The point is my husband doesn't know that i have been secretly gambling and involving myself with gambling discussions and the rest, So, this morning when i woke something in me keeps telling me i should let him know to understand my involvement  to practice gambling.

Does this worth telling him or not please i need you collective ideas.

For me it's better that you will tell your husband that you are involve in gambling cause once you will tell the truth then there's a possibility that your husband will not mad at you cause you tell him before he know that you are a gambler. But if you don't tell your husband then it is still okay cause it's your decision but one thing for sure he will know soon. Cause like what saying says there's no secret that will not revealed  and once that happen then there's a chance that he will be mad and then it cause into misunderstanding.
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January 12, 2024, 03:07:17 AM
 #131

Hiding something from your partner, especially in terms of gambling, is like activating a time bomb, sooner or later it will explode by itself. You need to tell your partner about the activities you have been doing so far, find the right time to tell it, hopefully his attitude will accept or not be angry with the gambling you have been doing all this time. Never store jackfruit in the house, when in time the aroma will smell, I think you understand what I mean.

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January 12, 2024, 04:26:02 AM
 #132

The point is my husband doesn't know that i have been secretly gambling and involving myself with gambling discussions and the rest, So, this morning when i woke something in me keeps telling me i should let him know to understand my involvement  to practice gambling.

Does this worth telling him or not please i need you collective ideas.
Why not, because gambling is not always bad things and I'm sure you do it responsibly, meaning you don't play using money for your living needs, especially if your husband is also a gambler, so you can discuss many things about gambling with him, such as casino games or sports betting, and It would also be better for your husband to find out directly from you rather than from other sources that could make him think negatively about you for hiding it from him.

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January 12, 2024, 09:17:08 AM
 #133

Hiding something from your partner, especially in terms of gambling, is like activating a time bomb, sooner or later it will explode by itself. You need to tell your partner about the activities you have been doing so far, find the right time to tell it, hopefully his attitude will accept or not be angry with the gambling you have been doing all this time. Never store jackfruit in the house, when in time the aroma will smell, I think you understand what I mean.
We only worry about her relationship with her husband if her husband finds out that she is gambling, especially if her husband finds out about it from other people's stories. It can make him angry and will cause arguments between them. No matter how clever we are at hiding our gambling activities, there will be people who eventually find out. If the people who find out are those closest to us, maybe they won't be able to accept it even if we say that we are still okay with gambling. He will feel cheated by you because you have not been honest with him, even though honesty is the most important thing in a household relationship, especially since we spend all the time with them. Hopefully, she can tell her husband, and everything can end well.

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January 12, 2024, 09:29:33 AM
 #134

Would be funny if OPs husband would also confess that he gambles Grin I really wonder what has triggered OP to hide fact of gambling. Like this is something to be ashamed of or do secretly. Maybe OP is from a country where gambling is illegal, and telling husband is making him partner in crime. And even then it is advisable to tell the truth. Since you are married, this means you are at least an adult, who is allowed to do everything that is legal. Since it is a husband, second closest person (first one is always a mother), I would not hide anything, as he must be the first person to help you.

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January 12, 2024, 09:38:18 AM
 #135

The point is my husband doesn't know that i have been secretly gambling and involving myself with gambling discussions and the rest, So, this morning when i woke something in me keeps telling me i should let him know to understand my involvement  to practice gambling.

Does this worth telling him or not please i need you collective ideas.
Everyone I believe have their different ways of reasoning and personal opinions about some vital issues especially when it has to do with personal issues and decisions and that's why it's important to respect everyone's opinion even when they look contrary to your own personal opinion.

If my own wife happens to be gambling without informing me and starts feeling guilty for her actions, the best thing to do for her is to stop gambling totally instead of telling me about her gambling engagements because I'm not gonna find it pleasing that she's been doing that for some time without notifying me. Gambling is a sensitive engagement that a wife is supposed to tell her husband before embarking on it in the first place so I'll find it very disrespectful that she started gambling without informing me so to save us from any kind of drama, it'll be best for her to end every gambling engagements she does in other to free her from any kind of guilt-tripping instead of telling me about it.

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January 12, 2024, 10:07:21 AM
 #136

Op you understand your husband very well and I'm very sure you should know if you inform your husband about your gambling activities you know how he will react,  if he will be okay with it or not. The most important thing is that if you play gambling responsibly and you are not addicted and you are very sure gambling is not affecting you negatively you don't need to be worried about. For me I think if you are not struggling will gambling like addiction,  playing with all your savings, playing everyday their is no need telling anyone about it. You can keep it to yourself if maybe you feel you husband will have a impression about your gambling lifestyle.

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January 12, 2024, 10:16:23 AM
 #137

I think honesty is important in relationships. Even well-intentioned secrets put distance between. By telling your husband about your gambling, you're sharing a personal part of your life. Trust can increase. However, sensitivity is a must when discussing it. Highlight your understanding of the dangers your commitment to not allow it hurt your financially, and that it's fun, not a financial strategy. Know his reaction and expect a range of feelings. His gambling perceptions and experiences will impact his response

Transparency strengthens relationships, in my opinion. It fosters understanding and cooperation. If he understands you, he may provide advice or assistance. Frame the conversation to show your responsibility and willingness to be open. This could be a turning point for both parties because relationships depend on honesty and respect

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January 12, 2024, 11:16:37 AM
 #138

When marriage is built on lies,there is that believe that the marriage will not last,the first thing that needs to be done while they are in courtship is for them to learn and try to understand each other,they must be open to each other in terms of all their deeds.If there is transparency in every thing they do,one party will not lie about his or her activities or engagement in gambling.
Gambling is not supposed to bring problem to any family because it is a means of survival,most persons are training and feeding their family with gambling,so when the wife finds out that the husband Gambles,it's not surposed to be a problem.

R


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January 12, 2024, 12:11:43 PM
 #139

I think every partner has the right to know what is happening with you especially if it includes financial decisions. Better, you are husband and wife so he definitely must know that you are gambling. I don't think he will be mad about it. Just my instincts. Maybe he will even just laugh it out.
For me, it's a sign of respect which is why I also told my wife about my gambling habit. Well, she also knows that I am too afraid to bet high amounts which is why she won't stop me from doing it. She knows I can control it and I am responsible enough that I don't let any day without food on the table. The same goes for their necessities and some food cravings whenever we go outside.
The truth is, it's harder to tell it to ladies than it is to men. Most men would not care as long as their partners are happy about what they are doing, especially for ladies who are staying at home and are too bored with their everyday routine. Better just be honest with it, I really feel like it won't go south when you tell the truth. If I am in that position, that will be my reaction. It's not like you are in pursuit of being a professional gambler.  Grin

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January 12, 2024, 12:26:23 PM
 #140


The point is my husband doesn't know that i have been secretly gambling and involving myself with gambling discussions and the rest, So, this morning when i woke something in me keeps telling me i should let him know to understand my involvement  to practice gambling.

Does this worth telling him or not please i need you collective ideas.

You two are married so the husband has the right to know, everything between the two of you is conjugal properties, so the money that you've used to bet is also your husband's money, so it's just right that your husband knows where the money is going, it's not good if he finds out that your spending both of your money on gambling.
So better tell her as early as possible it will have bad consequences if he finds out and it will have a bad effect on your marriage.
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